Simply Carolina Dreamz » WLS » Post Op WLS 4/30/03 Part Three (Re-post)

Post Op WLS 4/30/03 Part Three (Re-post)

For the last two years, I’ve blatantly ignored my gastric bypass surgery (or that which I could, rather), in lieu of living and doing my best to continue to lose weight.

I had easily become bored with weigh-in’s, chart updates of loss, etc, when I hit a serious plateau.

A plateau of weight loss was inevitable for someone who was still barely able to move. My back pain had progressed and I had become discouraged that after such a drastic operation to change me, it had done very little to my everyday movement abilities. Quite frankly, I was depressed to be disabled after making such drastic changes in my life.

Over the past two years, however, my weight loss has continued and slowly I just feel I melt, too. Its a hard phenomenon to explain. I just wake up some days and decide to get on the scale and I stand there simply stunned at what I see.

Once I broke the 200 pound mark, I really felt encouraged again. I no longer really care if I lose another pound. I’m so drastically different, today, that I’d be pleased to stay right where I am. With that said, this is not happening, at all.

After watching a couple of video’s posted from “melting mama”, I feel encouraged to try some of the foods that can help me balance and be nutritionally better, again. It was nice to hear someone else joke and carry-on about how good some things have become, that were simply non-palatable just a few years ago.

Words like “non-protein texture tasting” and “love nuggets” for chocolate cookie pieces in a protein bar, were enough to make me feel that I could venture out into protein bars again, and probably find my disgust a lot less profound.

My surgery experience was rather unique because I was unable to use any sugar substitutes and I’m allergic to many ingredients in pre-packaged or canned soups. When I came home from the hospital, everything that I knew to do, didn’t work for me, at all.

All of the protein powders that I had tried, sampled and experienced before, simply made me gag. I quickly was unable to eat/drink anything that I had prepared for my long months of recovery.

I also could not drink water. It made me “sea sick”. It wasn’t long before I truly felt that I was going to die.

I didn’t know that my pain medication was making me very sick and that I did need another prescription for this amazing feeling of “sea sickness”. When I finally called the surgeon and had the new prescription picked up for me, I stopped heaving into a water bottle. It didn’t, however, make it easier for me to drink water.

I was quickly switched to Gatorade. It is my understanding that I was having difficulties with minerals in bottled water. Who knew? Who knew that the taste of water would be so profoundly disgusting to me? I surely did not. (Update: 2010  I’m digusted with Gatorade and back to drinking bottled Water and soda. I’m disgusted that I buy bottled water, but if it gets me to drink it, I’m buying it, again.)

Now, four years later, I still drink Gatorade instead of water. I’m not hard on myself about this. I just accept that I can’t drink water like everyone else can and I let go of my feelings of insecurity surrounding this, in my life. Its strange and I’m okay to be strange about it!

When I could not eat any strained cream soups, unless I made them, myself (and I wasn’t going to get up to cook for a very long time!), I had to figure out what I could eat.

What I did eat was terrible for me. I had two basic staples. They all circled around instant mashed potatoes and refried beans. These products were made into my “strained soup”, and I learned to add processed cheese (velveeta or borden) to these for added protein. Please note that prior to surgery, no one could have made me eat any processed cheese. So I had potato soup and bean soup, and sometimes with cheese. It had no consistency and yet it kept me alive.

I could not eat anything with Splenda in it and I could not eat any sugar substitutes. This limited what I could eat down to next to nothing.

Today, however, I can’t say there is anything that I CAN’T eat, except those things that I had been allergic to before my surgery.

I simply do not eat many things, though. Not because I’ve ever told myself that I can’t have them. Mostly because when I have tried them, I didn’t care to eat them anymore. I don’t like them.

Potato Chips and Ice cream are on this list. I really don’t care for many dairy products that are not some form of cheese or cultured. I don’t care to eat a lot of sugar, anymore, but I’m not against eating sugar and I can’t tell you that I never eat foods with sugar in them, because I do. I don’t care for soda or any carbonated beverages, anymore, either. (Update: I’m a Dr. Pepper Junkie now in 2010.)

I only really miss one thing. Broccoli. I can eat it if it is cooked soft, but I really don’t care to eat broccoli soft. Every attempt to eat it the way I like it, has been a negative experience, and I just choose to avoid it now.

There are some particular eating habits or patterns that you just learn to add to your daily life, when you live post gastric bypass. I think I’ve done much better psychologically, to never have given myself many “can not’s”.

I have changed many quantity issues with food into high quality issues. I don’t eat much of it, so I eat the best that I can eat of it. I’m also much happier having or tasting a bite of something you are eating, than ordering my own. If you can handle that, then we’ll get along just fine! If not, then food isn’t a part of our life together.

It’s not that difficult for me. I do not feel I’m missing out on eating. I do not mind when others eat around me. It really doesn’t bother me to stop eating while someone else continues to eat. That is normal for them. And now its normal for me, too.

 

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